Worst Person in the World
When Keith Olberman was on MSNBC, he used to do a segment in which he “crowned” the Worst Person in the World. According to customers in the last week, I’m a solid contender for the next crown.
Here are the reasons I’ve been yelled at by customers in the last week:
– it snowed.
– the district canceled school.
– water freezes in 9 degree Fahrenheit temperatures.
– the delivery of chewing tobacco was delayed by the distributor.
– their credit card was declined by their bank.
– candy is too expensive.
– I would not help him commit fraud by printing up bogus receipts to turn in to his company.
– we only had 17 kinds of tea, and not the one she wanted.
– the state lottery rules are unfair.
– someone somewhere won MegaMillions and it wasn’t the customer standing in front of me.
– I carded them.
– I didn’t know if a particular repair shop had the size tire he needed in stock.
– the candy was too cheap.
– I grabbed shorts instead of 100s.
– I grabbed 100s instead of shorts.
– I grabbed silver instead of gold.
– I didn’t know he wanted Red Label instead of Reds when he asked for Reds.
– promotional KitKats are cheaper than regular KitKats (not the same person as previous person upset about candy being too cheap or too expensive)
– the gum was in the gum and candy aisle and not in the chip aisle where he wanted it.
– the keypad on diesel 18 broke in the blizzard, meaning they have to come inside to turn the pump on.
– I didn’t know that he needed a refund for the thing he didn’t tell me about.
– the Subway restaurant was taking too long.
– we don’t have overnight parking.
– we don’t have showers.
– his company made him use our stop and he wanted a different one.
– I asked him for the information his company requires in order to process the card and turn on the pump.
– the lottery machine overheated.
– the lottery machine jammed.
– the lottery machine printed his 2 tickets on 2 tickets instead of on 1 ticket.
– I leaned over the lottery machine to reach for something and my boob touched a button and printed a different ticket than the one she hadn’t yet asked for.
– because bags of ice are cold.
– bottles of pop on the shelf (not in the cooler) are not cold.
– tubs of ice cream do not come with spoons, so I had to give him a plastic one from behind the counter. For free.
– donuts were buy-one-get-one-free and she only wanted one.
This list is a very limited representation and does not include reasons coworkers have been bogus. However, I think a special shout-out is owed to a boss who chastised me for going to visit an uncle on my day off, meaning I couldn’t get there in an hour to cover someone else’s shift when she called off at the last minute.
See? I told you: Worst Person in the World.