The Bitch of It
I have lost a second-grader and my
jeans are smaller than they have been in over
a decade but the
truth is I feel just as fat.
I have really pretty eyes and decent hair
and cute freckles but the truth is
I am insecure about my ears and
the round, puffy shape of my face
and on a good day, I feel plain.
I am a genius and learn faster than
most people but
the truth is I would trade it if
it meant the mocking stopped.
I am honest, loyal, and forgive
people for big things and more often than
they deserve but
the truth is I rarely afford myself the same.
I have a degree in studying
people and work with them all
day long but the truth is
I don’t understand people at all.
I love some people, and I love
them intensely and without hesitation
but the truth is I feel enormous
guilt for not loving as many people
as I should.
I am loved by people who believe
in me when I don’t and see good in
me when I can’t but the truth of it is
I cannot understand why they do.